A Vision of Newt Gingrich's Moon Colony: The Federal Government in Action

The big news the last 24 hours has been Newt's Florida speech pandering the NASA crowd. Were nearly $16 trillion in debt with over $100 trillion more in unfunded liabilities, and Newt wants to establish the moon as a colony and eventually make it the 51 state in the union.

“When they have 13,000 Americans living on the moon, they can petition to become a state.”

“By the end of my second term, we will have the first permanent base on the moon and it will be American,” Gingrich added.

So I have been pondering what Newt's colony might look like, and I figured out the way the federal government is these days, 13,000 may not be that hard to come by.

With all the government bureaucracies, there will be much opportunity to expand government to create the 51st state--a state consisting mainly of federal employees. You obviously start with NASA because the astronauts will be the original settlers. Then from there it really gets quite wacky as things often do with the federal government.

Obviously, the EPA would get involved, because you have to have them protecting life on the lifeless surface of the moon. Can you imagine the regulations?

The Interior Department would have to stake their claims on craters as National Parks. No development where an asteroid violently bombarded the moon because that will soon become part of the great American heritage under Newt's plan.

Then of course, the IRS would have to set up shop. You know, can't have colonists hiding their assets in the Caymen Craters or other off-galactic accounts.

You can't leave the TSA and Department of Homeland Security out of the equation. Someone has to feel up grandma after she leaves for earth after a week of spending with over radiated grandchildren living beyond the Van Allen radiation belts. I wonder if they would expose grandma to more radiation considering the amount she took in just getting to the moon?

You get the picture? The moon soon would become polluted with federal filth and 13,000 people would be reached in little time. Newt's goal is eight years, an arrogant prediction that we would actually elect this bozo. This is the vision I see when Newt talks about Moon statehood.

All of this is just so absurd!